Karen

Disclaimer

Rules & Regulations

Read them carefully!

Welcome to oh-so-karen@blogspot.com.
Hush & Listen up!

You're not allowed to:-
-Copy, Rip, Spam, Steal & more...!

If you hate me, kindly click the red 'x' button on the top-righthand corner of the screen.
If you love me, please stay to enjoy. :D

Remember to tag me before leaving.
Showing only Number posts.
Other than that, enjoy yourself! :D

Blog

Sunday, November 29, 2009; 3:29 AM

Have been spending th past few days preparing for the school's open house and my aunt's wedding. tiring. but it was all over yesterday. both events took place yesterday.

in the morning, went to skol for open house. stayed abit after my shift to help out more. thn went with my whole family to finish up th shopping spree for the wedding later on at night. louis came shortly after. ate long john's and saw luqman. apparently he worked there. =] thn went to play pool with louis and sis. until around 4 plus. reached home ard five plus and started preparing to go out already. omg heels are so hard to balance man. cant even walk properly. LOL. first time wearing heels. cnt blame me right? hah.

whoa. 2 weeks seems so long. only 1 week and one day has passed. sad. dec is coming. and i feel like as if i am running out of time. i miss you. i dunno if you feel th same over thr. but yeah. people keep asking if you are my boyfriend. LOL. i guess you would have to answer that for yourself huh. but it's fun with you ard.=]
sometimes i wish you were here
loves,
K

Thursday, November 26, 2009; 2:43 AM

haven't been blogging for the past few days, had drama today. yes i knoe it is a Thursday. but i needed to help miss Khoo. so yeah. kerthana and i were in the com lab after setting up everything. and she was blog hopping and came across this blog. i read it and it was hilarious. the way they talk about those people was rather insulting but it is the truth. i am not going to elaborate. just scroll down and click on the aal link. it would make you people laugh your ass off. i swear.

even if it is just one second, i just want to be by your side. i know that it is no longer possible between us. i never expected you to love me back. i thought i had forgotten about you. but it hurts even at the mention of your name. other girls tell me that you are cute, that you are not bad. all i can do is smile but it hurts. i dont understand why, why i cnt get over you. memories keep flooding my mind. i still keep pooh pooh by my bedside. i cnt bear to throw it away.

' it's playing on repeat...'

loves,
K

Monday, November 23, 2009; 3:33 AM

" when you are in love, you cant fall asleep because reality is better then your dreams."
dr suese

"You come to love not by finding the perfect person but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly"
sam keen

got these from yvonne ah mah's blog.thanks ah mah!! it is so true. it's weird how someone who is so imperfect to others could seem so perfect in your eyes. it's lyk they can never do sth wrong and you feel that he is too good for you. maybe that is why love is blind? haha. kinda hurts too.

it leaves you in a state of confusion when you dunno if you are really in love. kinda forgetten how love feels lyk. seems to hurt alot and somehow dun feel lyk touching it.

well.. am i in love? someone tell miie!!

Loves,
K

omg lah. bored ttmax!!

this morning made pancakes with sis and louis. okayy lah. i was busy go down to buy things and stuff. th pancakes was damn filling lah! but not bad. thn we told mum she no need to buy lunch instead she can eat at home. thn she ate th pancakes and say not bad. haha. yay!

so yeah. played maple for awhile!! not bad leh. kinda lyked it!! zach is going to say i told you so when he gets back from india lol.

swimming with shawn this fri. should i go? or maybe just a movie with marc? hmmms.

Loves,
K

Saturday, November 21, 2009; 9:55 PM

Happy Birthday Clareeeeeeee!!!
ahh. lazy lazy sunday.... sun is shining oh- so- brightly. woke up ard 9 plus when i slpt at 2 plus ytd.. omg. couldnt sleep. thinking about how is he overseas and some other things. went to talk to dad as he was awake and eating pineapple tarts. =].

so yeah. miss zach alot. damn sian lah. without him. second day nia. marc misses him too... right now he is lyk burning his ass off at india.... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...

Loves,
K

went to vivo with clareeeeeee today. tmr is her birthday. haha. so yeah. we went to sky park, daiso and candy empire. ate alot of things until damn full. took alot of pics. haha. =] more on facebook. =]

cnt help but keep missing him. lolx . also dunno why. feeling guai guai deh. could it be what shawn gorx said? if it is i think i am going to get myii heart broken once more. argh. dun wana think about it but it keeps getting into myii head. omg.

loves
K

Friday, November 20, 2009; 6:34 PM

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TWINIE!!!

so yeah. waited for 12 last night to send a happy birthday msg to him haha. but i cnt be thr for his birthday. sry!>

couldnt get to slp last night. zach is reaching th airport at 12 and flying off ard 2 plus. and right now he is on th train to ragistan.( dunno how to spell.) so yeah. last night was talking to him after i blogged and stuff. 15 days. have to wait lyk 2 more weeks before i cn talk to him again... argh sian. ytd was super fun. we made a deal that when he came back, we are going out again and this time, more photos! haha. cuz th album ytd was 90% him. =] lol. whoa he was right. without him quite sian leh. haha. not good. miss him.

so yeah tmr clareeeeeeeee's birthday. wans to ask her to go out. but nobody is picking up her house phone. miss her lah. haha. she has been with miie for lyk 7 years. =] yay! next year eight liao. haha. loveeeeeeeeee her lah.

i am so confused right now. is this just a crush or more then that? if we are just friends why do i feel tat way ard him? omg. i cnt lyk him.

Loves,
K

have been meeting zach for th past 3 days now. funnnnnnnnnnnnnn! but tmr he is going to india alr. sad.. so yeah. wed we went to get somethings for his trip and he treat miie chocolate bubble tea. awesome. haha.it is damn nice. and he also lyk honeydew. yay! so yeah. we went to imm. thn walked around. bought his things and walked somemore. =] saw dee at daiso. said hi to her. haha.

thursday, went to marc's for dinner.saw syareena on myii way thr. played uno spin with marc and his sisters. zach was 5 hrs late. he came in thn scared miie from behind by grabbing myii shoulders and said boo. i scaremed. what th... and during dinner he kept pin pointing at miie. bleah. luckily for him, marc is his riot shield. haha. played with tasha( marc's dog) for while. thn his dad sent miie home. haha.

today is lyk an almost whole day event. went with zach to buy th remaining stuff for his trip to india. met him at 10.30 at jurong east mrt. had breakfast at his house. haha. his step mum told miie that th sausage we had for breakfast was his fav kind of sausage. lol. he eat until damn full. thn we went to AMKhub. cuz his step mum has something to attend to. so we stayed thr for about 2 to 3 hours. walked and walked ard.

thn we went to a nearby sports shop. 3rd and 4th floor. th view was damn nice. i stood at th railing and looked down. thn he said tat he could carry miie and i would feel lyk as if i was falling. i didnt believe he could carry miie. thn he said, i prove to you. and carried miie. damn scary lah. omg. haha

after which, we ate andersons ice cream! damn nice. pics onn facebook yeah. he treat. haha. after which went to army market at beach road. it was damn cool lah. i had an interest for army stuff since young. but didnt pursue it somehow. he said that i shdnt also. cuz i am a girl. LOL he showed miie his ranking and stuff. =] cool lah.

went back to th car and headed for orchard to get his india money. =] thn headed for queensway, his step mum went to eat laksa while he and i went to look for his pants and walked ard. haha. finally found them. walked for awhile more. thn headed back to th laksa stall to look for his step mum. ate thr too. =] thn his step mum fetch miie to the bus stop. i walked home.=]

aww. you go india must take care horx. thr veh cold at night dehs. you shd have listened to your step mum lah. gonna miss you during these 15 days. haha. no one to talk to during late nights. aww. haha.

Loves
K

Tuesday, November 17, 2009; 6:22 PM

so yeah. i am lyk super bored now. holidays are making miie feel damn sian. it's lyk bored ttmax! nth to do but stay home. need to start studying soon yeah. cant seem to in th afternoon though. dunno why. twinie's birthday is lyk this sat. and and next sat is lyk open house liao. sad. zach is flying for india this sat. =( so yeah. need someone to pei miie. aww. damn sad lah.

sometimes we all try too hard to be someone we are not. to be someone we want to be. not who we are. but others have to understand that its hard to find who you really are. hard to realise. when you are blinded by what you want. it's not easy either. ppl label you. but why do we try so hard to achieve something? cuz we want it.

i just listened to only recording we have during our first five months. it seemed so happy. i miss you. miss your voice. miss every little thing about you. and and pooh pooh needs it's daddy too. myii heart is damn pain. ppl say i need a new stead. i dun think i would get one anytime soon. cuz i dun think i am loved. =(

baby... i feel so alone.

loves,
K

omg so fucking pissed with my family right now. so yeah. my parents are accusing me me things I didn't do. it is always my fault when my sis is unreasonable, I on the com to use then she comes home and bugs it saying that she wants to use. she hogs it and mum starts asking her to go bathe. she bathed and then sat in the room doing dunno what shit thing. so obviously I use la. then she comes out sees me in the chair and screams her ass off. she assumes that I am not using it in the first place. then she say what I use the com when she is using. what the. and then it ended in heated argument and now she is in her room sobbing and saying that she hates this family.

what the hell is wrong with her ? can't she see what this family has done for her? fuck la. and I am the one that has to sit outside and get all the scoldings and the pin pointings. say something also cannot. I tolerated like all her sass and all her shit.give in to her all the time. keep her company when she is ill. I dun mind not getting any returns but why am I always the one that gets hurt? that gets all those shit stuff. didn't I work hard enough? I feel so fucking alone. it hurts and no one is here for me.

loves,
K.

Monday, November 16, 2009; 6:42 PM

omg drama ltr. dun feel lyk going. woke up ard lyk 10 plus today. felt damn bleah. so yeah. facebooking and was photobucketing. =] love editing pics now. haha. and and just joined twitter. not bad. but lyk quite boring leh. i think i shall stick to facebook. and and i am lyk 115 mil onn ffs.

so yeah. ytd went to eat'lunchner' with twinie after his sl camp. it was fun and i have his shirt. i have to wawsh it. cuz i dropped it on th floor ytd. ohhs wells. i told twinie that zach said i am his property cuz he wrote his name on myi leg. thn twinie said that i am his property cuz he owns miie on ffs. and he was lyk he cn buy you thn say lah. lolx. thn zach said that twinie owns miie virtually but he owns miie physically. so i am going to try to get the pen mark off myii thigh. haha.

most probably thurs gonna watch movie. anyone has good recommendations? btw sis watched 2012 alr so that is so out liao.

loves,
K

Sunday, November 15, 2009; 6:32 PM

ytd louis and zach came over.=] we played taiti and i kept losing myii sis kept winning. so we played truth or dare. lolx. i think keep playing taiti damn boring lah. haha. thn truth or dare was damn fun! haha. zach was supposed to lyk write his name on myii leg. veh itchy leh. cnt stop laughing. haha. thn he say what hav his name on myii leg that means i am his property. he cn do anything lyk sell miie or sth. wth. thn i say lyk cannot lah. thn he just smiled. LOL.

ytd your pooh pooh almost lended in th dustbin. i cnt bear to see it in th dustbin or throw it away. myii heart hurts. i cnt stop those tears from falling. why does it still hurt so much? memories filled myii mind. i cn remeber almost every single detail. you were so important to miie. zach asked what is it about this guy you cnt forget? why you cnt seem to forget him?i dunno anymore. you changed so much. mayb it's just th memories...

want to go back in time. to stop to look at those moments once more. the first time i told you i loved you. th first time we held hands. th first time i kissed you. th first 5 months we been tgt. th first time you hold miie in your arms. it all seemed lyk it was just ytd when you last hold miie. 4mths plus of waiting. wanted you so bad. but now it's all over. a fact that can no longer be changed.

loves,
K

Saturday, November 14, 2009; 9:46 PM

so yeah. stayed at home again today. haha. went out for breakfast with family. thn came home and watched tv. ytd after dinner, whole family played card games lyk taiti. haha. fun. super bored leh. not calling anyone cuz they might not b free on sundays. it is mostly family day.

i dun wana be mean to you. but since that is th only way for you to forget miie thn so be it. tat is th only way. why are you still talking to miie?... go study bah. your eoy comming. must jyjy horx. cannot let miie down thn mayb we can go out to watch what you wanted to watch .i'll accompany you. i promise. =] if only you are looking at this. mayb you will understand.

omg lah. damn bored. talking to zach on fb now haha. mayb he can entertain miie.

loves.
K

craving for peanut butter m&ns since morning. omg. but cnt go down and buy. mummy wont allow. haha. so yeah. washed myii shoe today. hate doing tat man. but i did. hahax. looks better thn before but still not veh clean haha. sad. and and i cleared myii table! yay!

ytd didnt feel lyk going online. so talked on th phone and watched tv. phone with twinie, yi zhe, zach and marc. bored until littat haha. nobody to play with. sis went out. super boring can. oh yeah and th other thing i did was listen to louis's ipod. lolx. he got alot of nice songs leh. hahax.

i wana go out! i wan that bag from montip! i wan i wan... hmms. i forgot. ohs yeah m&ns peanut butter!!!! hahah.

so confused now. why cnt ppl just tell me straight?

loves,
K

Thursday, November 12, 2009; 6:52 PM

after what you said ytd.i guess now tat i knoe th truth, it's easier to let go. i should just forget it all.shouldnt be crying, but i cnt help it. it hurts so bad. why? cried ytd. and today cried again. when is this gonna stop?

so bored man. nth to do today. no one pei miie

today was funnnnnnnnnnnnnn! went to jurong east with marc and theodore. thn went on th long stretch of river thingy. hahaha. with th float. it was damn cool lah. thn we went to th slide. it was damn scary lah. freaked miie out okayys. thn veh giddy. cuz i am scared of heights and darkness. walao. thn we went to th children's playground. th water is damn cold lah. thn they wanted to play catching. so play lo.

thn went back to the long river thingy. we tried th '3 man float'. lolx keep falling. thn i fell on zach, pain lah. he lyk some rock sia. but he also fell on miie when we tried again. we tried onn different ppl's float. when they tried mine i sat in th middle and both of them sat on th side. lolx. damn crowded. catching hold of each other and trying not to fall at th same time. and most of th time i didnt have to carry myii float cuz they helped miie. =] so sweet.

after al of that, we went to eat kfc. hahahahahah. marc and i ate th same thing. theodore ate 3 piece chicken. walked back to th mrt. thn hugged theodore and went off with marc. until bouna vista. thn hugged and homed. bought ice cream on th way.

ytd zach came to myii house. stayed until around 11pm. it was enjoyable having him around. we talked about alot of things. =]

everything takes time. i am trying so hard. a little too hard. i realise tat i still love you all th same.

loves,
K

Tuesday, November 10, 2009; 6:13 PM

today didnt go to skol.spending the morning watching tv, eat cereal and now using th com. so yeah.

ytd i was talking to marc.told him tat myii life so far is lyk always on th down side. thn he told miie, what about th time you stead with him? i smiled at that question. yeah i was happy when i was with him, that 5 mths... was almost th happiest period of myii life. pity i didnt treasure it. mayb right now, if you give miie someone else, i might not treasure that person. but him, i definately will.

i knoe it's no use hanging onn to it. i am not. at least trying not to. trying not to talk. when you are thr. myii heart is pumping so fast i dun even knoe what to say. i feel that you are too good for miie. and i cnt seem to catch up.=(

loves,
K

finally. chinese o levels ended already. it was scary when you step into the examination hall. really. it's lyk this is it or sth.

so yeah, nth much today. had chinese o in th morning, had breakfast with sis. after first paper saw marc, yan bin. nic too. and him. =] then went to th toilet before going back for paper 2. after paper 2, went around with marc, afif and daryl. played taiti for about and hour or so. then waited for afif with marc cause he got sth on. thn went for drama. thn went to tiong. it was damn fun. take bus thr and walked back. myii juniors were awesome. chatted with iris and homed.

i am trying. it's just so hard. everytime i think about it, i could just cry. and i dun cry veh often. it's hard to cry. i failed to treasure what is right infront of miie. today when myii fren told miie sth, i felt horrible. jealous i think . hahax. unexpected. dun lyk tat feeling.

trying so hard, why?

loves,
-K

Sunday, November 8, 2009; 11:48 PM

today. had dnt , chem and chi. omg stress. now nth to do, playing tic tac toe with him. he keep saying tat he is going to own.... dots. smart lah. own liao littat. lolx. bleah . but he learn quite fast leh.

Random

o levels............................................................................................... are killing miie. worse still chinese. i am afraid. really afraid. i have beem taking hmt since p5. it is lyk 5 years of taking it. and i am afraid. afraid of not making it. and i cnt do much expect read and practice. ohhs wells.

it has been raining for th past few days. sad and hurt. for miie, life is getting into a mess, a very big one at that. i cnt seem to control. everything seems to be spinning out of control. frustrating.

i want you back. i want myii life back. i want everything to be back lyk how it used to be with you. i dun care what others say. that is their mouth. if they want to dirty it, thn go ahead.

whyy are ppl so obssesed with making other's life difficult ? it's not going to make their sad lives any better. even if they are pathetic, tat doesnt mean tat they get to mess with other ppl's lives just because their is not good enough. that is what losers do and you will be surprised how many of them are out thr.

make th best of everyday tat you have, cause no matter what happens, baby i'll be thr for you.

♥s
-K

Thursday, November 5, 2009; 11:50 PM

today is just really humid. drizzling on and off. thn all of a sudden heavy downpour. th rain was cooling yet it's pretty uncomfortable when you are wet. rain reminds miie of tears. somehow it makes miie feel blue. i think of you when ever i feel blue, i miss you. alot. i want you hold miie in your arms lyk you used to. hold myii hands and not letting go.

crying, after a veh long while without you. dunno why... trying not to think already. but th more i try, th worse i feel. with all these going on, i thought it's probably easier to forget. trying not to talk to you. i dun wana disturb you or irritate you. remember pooh pooh? you gave it to miie on myii 14th birthday. it is still sitting at myii bedside. it seems to hold alot of beautiful memories we once had. i saw th way you were looking at it when i brought it to camp. you stared at it and thn at miie. it was lyk as if you were surprised i remembered and kept it. how could i forget?

supposed to be studying for chi o levels now. it is 4 days away. i seriously think i am going to fail. i think i am going to express chi next year. thn 5 years of hmt so far will be really wasted. going to study later. i am not so slack. i cnt afford to be...

wasnt late for dnt today. good thing. jaeme and i were th only ones thr. as we were about to start a whole bunch of ppl came in. i handed him his box. though it didnt mean much. rica and i went to start on th box first. did th wires later. but she was faster. most probably had to do with miie helping others. lyk guan tong! lolx. but nvms it's fun helping ppl.

aft dnt is hmt, but yin mei and i was late. cuz mr khoo released us late. but yeah. sat with her too. thn hui jia and shan wen came and hui jia sat next to miie. it was cold inside. both of them had jackets... awww...

waited for twinie for ard an hour. he still had lessons. ytd he waited for miie thn today i wait for him lo. talked to theodore on th phone. until ard 15 mins to 11.40. went back to skol, chatted with marilyn and yin mei for awhile. thn talked to hong yi. he thought tat twinie and i were tgt. wth. i told him no. thn he askeed if i have a stead, i said no,have ex. he wanted to knoe who is it. twinie come down alr, hong yi hold onn to myii bag. so kpo. haha.

walked to th bus stop with daryl chang cuz twinie wanted to follow him or sth. thn he realised tat tat busstop has no 33 so we walked back . saw some 3a guy and started talking. reached tiong and ate ebi rice burger. awesome. hahax. twinie kept 'coping' myii fries. bleah. thn he treat miie donuts. =D thn bused home with him. =] he said we have been lunching tgt for 4 consecutive days. LOL

i want to love you.

♥s

-K

it's raining heavily today. got drenched on my way to buy mashed potato for myii sis. th rain peeled against myii skin, wind blowing against myii body, i felt cold and alone. i wished you were here with miie, sheltering miie from th rain as you would a very long time ago. it was almost raining th whole day. i sat in class watching th raindrops falling, it reminded miie of how fragile it all was.

today i was late for dnt. got scolded from mr khoo. he said i was strolling into class. we learned how to attach wires and assemble our product. awesome. went with yin mei to find glad afterwards. waited for her fnn to finish. went to tiong. saw benedict , sq and edrick two times. returned to skol for hmt. twinie lent miie his unwashed jacket. he dun bother to wash it . lol

after hmt, walked to queensway with twinie. thr he ate curry rice and otah. and we saw shirts tat could light up. hahax. cool. it reacts to sound waves too. =] walk walk awhile aft twinie finished his lunch. saw his friend thr too. his friend is damn cute. lol. thn walk walk some more and then bused home with twinie. =]

it hurts real bad.

♥s

-K

Tuesday, November 3, 2009; 2:39 AM

so yeah. i dunno man. this is damn messed up... not gonna go into details cuz sis wana use th com.

i dunno how long i cn hang onn. i miss you. wanted you so bad. but i guess it's just all myii wishful thinking.

♥s

-K

Monday, November 2, 2009; 1:05 AM

so yeah. start of extended curriculum today was poa, chem, geog elec and mathx. lolx i didnt have to go for geog and glad pei-ed miie even though she had to go. thn aft tat ate lunch with twinie at anchor point. kfc!! hahax cuz myii sis wanted cheese fries. =D tmr i m gonna get her sweets. hahax.

it's probably just another day moving between skol and home. i think. th weather is freaking hot today, somehow it is. and twinie.. it is not cuz you are here. lolx. recess was damn long la. hahax no bell somemore. dots. one hour of lessons. two hours later thn cn have recess. and th worst thing is thr is no porridge today. sad

so lyk i was onn msn , thn i saw myii friend's pm. it went lyk "hi i need a girlfriend". so i was wondering. is having a stead really important? isnt it suppose to be stead cuz you love tat person? well love is not littat, it's more then just th feeling. it's th person. it is contradicting. it is being selfless. it is wanting th best for him or her. i think. roughly. thr is no true definition.

just really bored now and somehow alot of things are getting onn myii nerves. for no apparent reason. not really. it has been littat ever since TAT day. lolx. this is not good. i mean seriously, it will be lyk some ridiculous shit. imagine. every other day. lyk what th hell. i dunno what's with miie and everyone ard miie. all being damn insulting. including miie. cn you believe it? i feel damn mean..... and damn bad.

oh yeah. some are not for not apparent reason. they are just freaking pissing miie off. damn fuck la. i feel lyk myii life is damn suck-ish. it seems lyk since i got to sec 3, i m being a failure at every other thing and you couldnt say tat i didnt try. I DID. in fact, really hard. in every aspects important to miie. and tat will somehow affect myii life. you might say i didnt try hard enough, all i cn tell you now is i am drained. thr is nth more i can do.

i am so darn tired of having fix everything tat started out wrong in th first place, thr is no remedy for it.

♥s

-K