Karen

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Tuesday, June 30, 2009; 5:37 AM

todae is lyk damn sleezy. i cnt help bt feel sth's a miss.

sumhow i keep wanting t watch micheal jackson's videos n listen t his songs. this weird obsession is getting to miie. and i cnt seem to stop thinking abt it. even at night. i juz wake up in th middle of th night wondering whr everyone goes aft they passed away. th mre i thot abt it th worse i felt.

todae he actually stepped into myii class... i was lyk OMG n glad was laughing cuz she knew y. thn i hide myii head under myii jacket. lolx. i really miss him. i mean i wana see him bt wheneva i do i dun dare t talk t him... at least nt anymre... i used t wel.. realy wana talk to him. nt tat i dun wana nw. its juz tat i m realy scared... his' get lost's n coldness makes miie feel sick. everytime i see him it's lyk as if myii heart broke into a million pieces. it juz keeps sinking. it's nt making miie feel any better.

Days of loving u.

those days seems nvr ending. i m realy veh tired.

Monday, June 29, 2009; 3:57 AM

first dae of skol. stepped into class n th chairs were lyk onn top of th tables. lolx. i felt lethargic. cuz sth happen. thn i didnt feel lyk seeing twinie at al. it is hard when he is so sweet. timetable changed alot. so todae we are supposed to hav se as our first period. bt our cher [mr khoo] didnt come so we did th questions onn th board:

what do you think you can learn from se lessons?
&
what do you wan to learn from se lessons?

almost every1 did it. i did, bt i forgot to hand it in. hahax

todae we had dnt n he was thr. wel of cuz.. bt lucas didnt come. anyways th whole dnt lesson, i crapped wit yin mei n yue xuan. half th time we were standing thr watching th boys do th lamp shade thingy over n over again.

so yarrhs.

i heard th passing of micheal jackson n i was shocked n saddened. i couldnt believe wat i was seeing onn th news. al of a sudden i felt th urge t listen t his songs n watched his videos. i love his songs. i dun understand how ppl cn judge him by wat he wans to do. stars wil b stars bt their personal life is beyond our reach. he is a musical genius. n i admire him.=]

Days of loving u.

i cn feel th distance alr. when r u ready?

Friday, June 26, 2009; 3:11 AM

found this pic juz nw. miie n sis when we were little. at tat time i was still taller thn her!! lolx.

abt wat u said... i knoe. i realy do. bt myii heart feels heavy knoeing u think tat way. i mean u ve been a really gd fren, realy nice n al.. even when u betrayed miie i did not say anything n i actually told u it was okayys. this didnt happen once or twice.. it happened quite a no of times. yet b cuz u were were always thr i didnt say anything. cuz u were a gd fren n stood by miie when i needed sum 1 thr. u taught miie alot n i ve sumhow improved in certain ways... i'd nvr thot i said this bt wat u said realy hurt miie deeply. sumhow wat ur image is no longer lyk b4. i feel tat u were so fake. n tat al those things u said was juz another lie. if u realy think tat way, thn al those things u did.. were they juz an act?

Thursday, June 25, 2009; 12:17 AM

dammit. cried again todae. n twinie is nt making miie feel any better. i mean crying is nt going t slove al myii prob. seriously. 3 times last week was pretty much enough 4 miie. i feel lousy this few daes. thr r alot of things tat r nt so easily sloved. sumthings r long term... other things r juz complicated. mayb i juz hav t face it.i m nt as strong ass i thot i was, i thot i could ovrcm al these without hasitationg nor crying. bt nw it juz isnt working 4 miie...

it juz so different without u. how i wished u were here this veh moment. with u, i cn overcm things better.

Days of loving u.

it's nt getting any better.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009; 10:49 PM

ytd had convo wit lucas, js, tim, jeric(sorta) n glad liu. it was damn funny. hahax. finally cn talk t him. surprisingly he nvr quit th convo. bt he keep saying miie. lolx. bt yarrhs. yay!

th mre i talk t u. th mre i lyk u. dots. i duno y... bt everything i say abt how i feel abt u is frm th bottom of myii heart n i really mean it. i duno if u 'll ever turn bk t look at those memories once mre, bt i wan u t knoe. no matter wat it is, wat u've done or how others look at u. i nvr give up onn u, i'll b thr when u nid miie, even if u dun.i'll b ur guardian angel, looking out n praying 4 u..=]

Days of loving u.

i miss staying in ur arms.

i m soo bored. chatting... hahax. nth much t update todae. juz veh emo. n dun wna lose him .

days of loving u.

i wana hold onn tight. so it feels lyk u'd nvr leave

Monday, June 22, 2009; 2:55 AM

i juz went t take a poll at

http://www.channelnewsasia.com/singapore n 89 % (43134) says t extend skol hols, 7 % (3603) says conduct lessons via Internet n 3% (1642) says students shd return to schools as scheduled. so yarrhs update on th skol hols thingy. cool huh. hahax.

i miss everything abt u. especially ur hugs n ur tapps onn myii head. i miss leaning onn u n juz staying in ur arms. thr is nvr a moment when i stopped thinking abt u. these r th thots tat kepp miie going when u werent thr. when u were at badminton practice, prefects meeting, av in th morning. n they r th same movtivation tat keeps miie going nw. i duno how long i cn kepp this up, cuz it's fading.i feel distant frm those memories. they r fading cuz it's been so long... i dun wan it t fade, t keep onsn fading... i wana keep it. bt i cnt help it. i wana hold onn t it, n hold onn tight, so it nvr fades n u r always thr.

Days of loving u

it doesnt feel th same anymre

Sunday, June 21, 2009; 10:25 PM

last week of skol hols i dun feel lyk going bk. feel damn siian.... i wonder wat's installed for studies when we go bk nxt wk. how i wished holidaes r extended. will b damn cool larrhs... i mean seriously nw 142 cases alr. n they stil want us t go bk t skol nxt wk? thr'll b ppl lyk walking al ard. it'll b damn crowded. even worse.... bt life has t go onn. n joyce is lyk y didnt th government ask every1 t wear mask? she has a point u knoe. nt tat i m paraniod or anything, it's juz precautions. bt u cnt stop every1 frm going out. i mean u cnt possibly stay hm al th time. u stil nid t go out n eat rite? unless u dun nid th eat (which is werid.). ohhs well.

ppl keep asking miie y i lyk u. n y u. i duno. i mean u've been thr since forever.

Days of loving u.

it's getting harder.

Saturday, June 20, 2009; 6:47 AM

todae went out wit glad t do chi project. we did abit n realised tat it could b simplified. so we went shopping. it was damn fun. n we also tasted peanut butter jelli bean. sh e said it was werid. hahax

i feel tat every one ard miie is lyk damn lucky. getting in love n stuff... th ppl they lyk lyk them bk. he told miie once.. bt tat was a long time ago this yr. i dun even knoe if he likes miie anymre. i juz wana knoe is tat soo hard. lolx

she told miie is was nt worth waiting 4 u. bcuz it's been so long. i duno... al i knoe is i dun wana. n it's hard t let go. i dun wana cry again.she had asked how many tears i wana shed 4 u. i duno. al i knoe is i dun wana let u go.

Days of loving u

everything seems different nw.

Friday, June 19, 2009; 12:04 AM

if i havent broken up wit him... todae wil b 1yr n 4 mths. we cm quite far really. bt who is thr t realise wat's between us? do i hav t do everything?

days of loving u

it nvr changed.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009; 5:45 AM

i vaguely remembered how i met him. it was 2 yrs ago. we were both sec 1... cher had put us beside each other. i remembered how i disliked him n chased aft him cuz he puled myii hair. things were strangely awkward between us but we were really close t each other. when we reached sec 2 things wnt up t a whole new level. i told him i liked him n boldly asked 4 stead, he said yes n i guess tat's how we started... when i remembered al this, it made miie feel tat it is worth it aft al. thx 4 th wonderful memories u given miie.. especially during those 5 precious mths.

days of loving u

Saturday, June 13, 2009; 12:19 AM

STEP ONE:
Spell your name with songs -

N-no air- jodinsparks
E-elevator-flo rida ft. timberland
O-one love-blue

K-kidnap my heart- th clivk five
A-addicted-saving abel
R- right now(na na na)- akon
E-(Everything I Do) I Do It For You - Bryan Adams
N-Numb - Linkin Park

STEP TWO:
– Name: Karen
– Birth date: 9 june,1994
-- Nickname: Karenah
– Eye Color: Black :D
– Hair Color: black , brown :D
– Zodiac Sign: Gemini

STEP THREE:
– The shoes you wore today:slippers
– Your weaknesses: js
– Your fear(s): insects!!
– Your perfect pizza: hawiian .

STEP FOUR:
– Your best physical feature: ask bestie .
-Your bedtime? : mostly at nine plus =]
– Most missed memory? al th time he was thr 4 miie

STEP FIVE:
This Or That…
– Pepsi or Coke?: COKE (:
– McDonald’s or Burger King:Burger King=]
– Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton ice tea =]
– Chocolate or Vanilla: chocolate!=]
– Cappuccino or coffee: cappuccino :D

STEP SIX:
Do You…
– Smoke: nope. it stinks.
– Sing: yupps =]
– Dance: yarrhs=]
– Take a shower everyday: obvious ! :D
– Have a crush: yes... well nt realy. duno how t say.
– Do you think you’ve been in love? : yarrhs.
– Want to go to college: yes!=]
– Like(d) high school: i guess.
- Want to get married: yarrhs=]
– Get motion sickness: sometimes . urgg .
– Think you’re a health freak: nopes.=]
– Get along with your parents: mostly=]

STEP SEVEN:
In the past month…
– Gone to the mall: yes! it was fabulous!=]
– Eaten an entire box of Oreos: nahs. oreos r nt myii thing.
– Eaten Sushi:i dun think so...
– Been on stage: yes... thr's a stage in th canteen!
– Gone skating: nopes.. sad.=[
– Made homemade cookies: nopes... i dun think so.
– Gone Skinny dipping: wat's tat?
– Stolen anything: nopes.

STEP EIGHT:
Ever…
– Played a game that required removal of clothing: no. eww...
– If so, was it mixed company: -
– Flashed anyone: no . ew . gross .
– Been beaten up: no (:
– Shoplifted: no . thats wrong .

STEP NINE:
– Age you hope to be married: dont know ):
– Numbers of Children: erm.. think abt it first..
– Describe your Dream Wedding: secret=]
– What country would you most like to visit? : japan!=]

STEP TEN:
In the opposite sex..
– Best eye color?: doesnt matter=]
– Best hair color? doesnt matter =]
– Short hair or long hair?: short! long is kinda werid...
– Height: taller than me ? any1 would b taller thn miie.

STEP ELEVEN:
– Number of people I could trust with my life:quite alot :D
– Number of CDs that I own: more than 100 ? more than i can count x.x
– Number of tattoos: none
– Number of piercings: 1

Personal Quiz
Who were you with yesterday?:mummy, daddy n younger sis.
What woke you up this morning?: duno.
Is tomorrow going to be a good day?:i duno, take 1 step at a time.
Do you like anybody?: yes. js

THE PAST
Ever thrown up in public?: yes! it was bad.
Passed out because of alcohol?: NO!
What’s on your mind RIGHT NOW?hols hw n js.
What kind of home would you like?: somewhere i belong .
What do you want to be when you grow up?: t work 4 law enforcement.(lawyer,Police

...etc.)
Where do you see yourself in 5 years?: not sure ..
Do you like candy necklaces?: they r cute.
When was the last time you fell over or ran into something? i duno.. almost every other dae?
Do you listen to music every day?: duh.
Do you still go trick or treating? : nopes . i want t...=[
What was the last thing you ate?:kwey chap=]
Are you a fast typer?:duno. stil cn larrhs.
Whats your favorite type of soda?: i duno.
Have you ever moved? : yarrhs
Have you ever won an award? : yarrhs. cross country.=]
Are you listening to music right now? : yarrhs.
How long ’till your birthday? : over alr.
When were you the saddest in your whole life?: i duno.
What time is it?: 15.05
Do you use ebay to buy or sell? : no.
Who makes you mad? : i duno.
Have you ever heard a song written about you?:no.
Something you want to happen in 2009? :secret... hahax... here's 1. good grades.

HONESTY SECTION
1. Honestly, what color is your underwear? :light pink
2. Honestly, whats on your mind? : tjs.=]
3. Honestly, what are you doing right now? : listening to music n tying this note.. trying t sms lucas bt forgot wat i wanted t type.

6. Honestly, have you done something bad today? : nopes
8. Honestly, who is the last person you talked to on the phone? : ah mah... sortda. i spoke into it wel mum was talking or holding on t th phone.
9. Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now? : nopes. shd i b?
10. Honestly, what makes you mad most of the time? : backstabbers n unreasonable freaks
11. Honestly, do you bite your nails?: last time
12. Honestly, have you had an eating disorder?: no, i dun think so.
13. Honestly, do you want to see someone this very moment?: yarrhs.tjs.
14. Honestly, are you keeping a big secret now?: yes. shh...
15. Honestly, do you have a friend you don’t actually like?:nt really.
17. Honestly, are you in denial?:of wat?
18. Honestly, do you get up in the middle of the night and eat?: nope.
19. Honestly, do you like anyone?: yupps. tjs
20. Honestly, does anyone like you? : yarrhs. shhh....

ANGER SECTION
1. What do you do when you’re mad?: i might pour water al over tat person or slap him/her.
2. What’s the worst thing you’ve done when you were mad?: poured water, slapped tat person n threw myi shoe at him..
3. Ever made anyone cry when you were mad? : dont think so .
4. Do you swear when you’re mad? : sumtimes.

CRYING SECTION
1.When was the last time you actually cried? : last week. i think
2. Ever cried yourself to sleep?: yupps.
3. Do certain songs make you cry?: i guess .
4. What usually makes you cry? : frens n family.

HAPPY SECTION
1. Are you usually a happy person?: yarrhs=]
2. What makes you the happiest?: family
4. Do you believe in yourself?: y nt?
5. When people say they think you are good looking/pretty, do you get happy?: duno. think so.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009; 11:38 PM

todae i feel damn tired... siian.. hahax. went t eat wit mum thn cm hm t read newspaper.... was smsing glad n lucas all along...

some guy tagged onn myii blog ytd... i knoe his out t make miie feel shitty n sucky... bt surprisingly it didnt work... i didnt feel angry at all.. i juz felt tat he is realy childish n extra.. i dun even knoe him.. if he's an upper sec or older... he's realy a failure cuz being a senior u shd knoe how t think. tat's myii point of view.. bt looking at his taggs i dun think he'd take it. n i hav a feeling it's th same person.. cuz th timing is too close 4 comfort.. let him say wat he wans... i've heard it al b4.

days of loving u

he hasnt replied myii msg... ytd aft i ate dinner, we came straight home... thn rex asked miie if i received his present... it was really sweet of him... i loved th present... thx rex!

i also learned frm lucas tat he choose th present n th wrapping himself even though th cost was shared between him, nic n lucas... bt yet he isnt replying myii msg... if he realy cared soo much y didnt he show it?

Tuesday, June 9, 2009; 4:25 AM

todae is myii b'dae... thr were 11 ppl n 11 tickets!! except twinie took 1 soo i only hav 10 wit miie... sz n his bro, rex, ken, tim, nic, lucas, js , marc n desmond were all thr!! n miie too! hahax... well... it was okayys... we met at 1pm n went t th arcade... twinie was hungry.. soo... he, his bro, marc n i went t carls' jr... i shared a burger wit twinie while his bro ate 1 by himself... n marc didnt eat anythin... thn we went up t th arcade again t find th rest... aft which we went t th cinema bt everyone stayed onn th first floor until ken went upstairs... it was damn fun todae... he was thr... lolx.. anyways... th movie was damn cute... n sweet... aft th movie twinie n his bro went first followed by desmond.. marc n i went onn th bus... thn we turned bk cuz rex n lucas was looking 4 miie... he pei miie go find them n he went hm too.. by th time i found them nic n js went hm le...:[
thn aft looking at cds.. we decided t go home... lucas n tim went tgt n i went wit rex n ken... n they sent miie hm... rite t myii doorstep... soo sweet... ohhs well going t celebrate wit myii family nw...
bye.

Saturday, June 6, 2009; 7:02 AM

myii family celebrated as myii b'dae in advance todae... it was damn sweet.. lots of pics taken... i gave th biggest piece of cake t myii mum... anyways tmr i m supposed t get ans tmr onn weather ppl are commming for th movie onn myii b'dae... i really hope tat it cn go smoothly n every1 cn b thr...

Wednesday, June 3, 2009; 11:56 PM

havent been blogging 4 2 daes... well... stil emoing though better now... hav nt fully recovered frm thn sat sickness... having giddy spells n stomach aches every nw n thn... cnt take dairy products anymre... ahh... hope still cn take th sweet... heehee...

talked t ryan when i was realy down... twinie called th following dae... i told him tat i felt ryan had changed... he didnt believe miie... he said tat r might b lying t miie... i duno larrhs... bt i cn really feel tat he changed alot... a little improvement i guess... nt too bad... hahax... made miie feel tat he was really nice....

anyways... he may nt b comming 4 myii b'dae cuz his mum has th same b'dae as miie... awww... siian... he might nt b able t go out... see. first bahhs....

Monday, June 1, 2009; 1:26 AM

i duno wat's wrong wit miie todae... i feel so out of place, didnt even feel lyk smsing... it's th third dae into th hols... wondering how t plan myii things... bt all tat kept appearing in myii thots is him... i duno larrhs... al i wan t do is listen t music, t clear myii thots... i wan t plan... bt i m veh scared tat everything will go wrong... juz feel lyk blogging... i dun even feel lyk smsing twinie... sum1 tell miie wat t do... i feel tat it's freaking hard t do wat i wan...even a simple b'dae... u cn say tat i m lazy, say tat i aint practical... say wat u wan... i guess it doesnt make a difference t miie... cuz words cn longer hurt miie... been thr done tat, th worse things ppl cn say... i hav all heard it... wat ppl think abt miie... watever... i cnt realy b bothered... soo wat if i went up t tat person n scold him or spit in his face? does it make miie a better person? backstabbed by one of myii besties... saying soo many lies behind myii back... tat was one of those peroids tat was realy bad 4 miie... bt it helpped miie see who r realy myii frens n who would really b thr... it realy broke myii heart when tat person didnt even apologise... i guess i m getting numb t negative comments ppl make abt miie... t wat used t hurt soo much, i stayed up crying... those daes tat left miie cold n unhappy... though cuz of different reasons... bt all cuz of wat others said n did... i knoe i cnt completely put it off... bt at least i hav th choice t live myii own life...